Surefire Signs You Were A 2000s Gay Teen On Long Island since told by our very own resident Long isle Lesbian,
Dayna Troisi.

Spray tans. MTV’s „Room Raiders.” Having an inexplicable crush on Janis Ian. Piercing your own tongue in a person’s cellar surrounded by successful Bunny posters. Constantly caught between getting emo and guidette. Obtaining shoved into lockers.

Every one of these things make-up the strangely specific experience with being a homosexual child on
Lawng Island
during the early 2000s. There was clearly absolutely one thing in the water on
Longer Island
, because there are more homosexuals than
nail salons
. I am aware this is exactly hard to believe, as suburbia tends to be a conventional wasteland, but that is what they WANT one to imagine. In reality, the audience is gay as hell. All my personal
ex-girlfriends
and greatest friends are queers through the Island of extended.

So, if no one otherwise relates to this record, I know you spray-tanned, sauce-eating, fist-pumping gays can get it. Love and please give the graduating class and go my
insta handle
towards lesbians just who escaped their unique hometowns and also make more than six numbers now.

Listed below are 131 signs that you were a Long isle
gay child
in the 2000s. Certainly, this record is loooong because the audience is extra AF– our lashes and listings are hella long– they do not say „Long Island” for nothing.

1

. You’d a GSA inside highschool

And you claimed you had been simply an „ally.”

2. You had gay cybersex in AOL chatrooms

A/S/L?

3. You had a secret Myspace page

Where you joined up with lesbian groups together with intense relationships together with other queer teens littered across America.

4. You covertly viewed
„The L Keyword”
and anxiously flipped back again to Nickelodeon any time you heard your mommy’s footsteps approaching

Your own reflexes had been on point with the remote.

5. You
fingered
this dark colored model

Longer isle gays will always be remarkable between the sheets as a result of these.

6. You used to be suspiciously good at consuming these

7. You believed the longer Island Medium was going to see you inside the supermarket and out that your entire family members

8. Ugly
right girls
insisted you had a crush on them

As if.

9. You’d an all-consuming crush on a punk elderly

Mine had a fohawk and wore safety pins as earrings.

10. „The Perks to be A Wallflower” rocked the globe

And in that second, we swear we had been

endless

homosexuals.

11. You dressed in
black colored lipstick

Because what’s getting queer without subverting ~norms~?

12. You had been darkly obsessed with Sylvia Plath

I am. Im. I will be. GAY.

13. The English teacher had been your very best pal

Merely

friend…

14. facts Or Dare was your chosen sleepover video game

You have not lived any time you didn’t just be sure to bribe your absolute best buddy into daring one hug the crush.

15. You were inexplicably turned on of the audio of mac ‘n’ mozzarella cheese existence stirred

Confess it.

16. You’d a fabulous homosexual kid BFF

Which lowkey is actually much too cool off for your needs today, really works in fashion, and hangs on with a bunch of directly types.

17. You could potentiallyn’t determine whether you desired to get Avril Lavigne or perform the woman

a wrap seemed awful on myself, therefore I understand that i simply planned to rest with her.

18. You were about
softball team
, or you are a timeless, unsporty lez anything like me, the program choir

19. You used to be on debate staff

And constantly argued pro-choice.

20. You paid attention to Regina Spektor and Kate Nash

21. You performed a rare monologue during the skill tv series

Mine had gotten me personally suspended.

22. You had key rendezvous during the ladies’ restroom

No hug is ever going to compare well with the adventure for the highschool bathroom kiss.

23. You took part in „Day of Silence”

As an „ally,” naturally.

24. You had been



irrationally



afraid to be outed towards moms and dads

We came out to my mother on gyno, because I ridiculously worried she’d inform my mom I’d a LESBIAN vagina.

25. You’d no gender education and then have never ever made use of a
dental dam

Sorry to all or any you gender teacher girls exactly who visited Smith College. I assume you should never rest with a Long isle lez?

26. You visited Warped tour or Bamboozle

And used Jac Vanek and TWLOHA jelly bracelets.

27. And asked band users from Cobra Starship to signal the body parts

Gabe Saporta finalized my personal boob, and my personal mother got aside my AIM membership.

28. You watched homosexual crap on
Netflix
and mentioned it absolutely was a major accident or even for a college job

29. You have got gigantic acrylic
nails
because not even homosexuality may in the form of a Long isle girl’s beauty program

Lesbian fail, but trend win.

30. You stained sprinkle tan all-over some stylish lesbians sheets the first occasion you hooked up

Sorry about this.

31. You self



consciously



had intercourse within bra because you happened to be dressed in a bombshell push-up bra from Victoria’s Secret

All our boobs appeared two sizes bigger than they actually had been ’cause of these foolish bras. I was a 36E with one, and I looked like a demented pervy comic strip.

32. You anxiously wished to be on
Jersey Shore

33. You didn’t have to lay to go to a lady’s house

The thing which makes it far more easy to develop up
closeted
.

34. home parties were high in underground homosexual debauchery

The cellar is when the homosexual shit takes place.

35. You appeared to find out if your own ring finger was actually more than your pointer fist to determine if perhaps you were truly a lesbian

As you heard it you secretly watched „The L keyword.”

36. Or took „in the morning I gay?” quizzes

We unequivocally understood I was gay at 13 years of age because Quizilla said I happened to be.

37. You



discovered



gay material thereon dark colored website
Ebaums Industry

38. Whenever youtube was created, you sweatily searched „girls kissing” in your family’s pc in the middle of the night

Which brought to…

39. You installed porn to Quicktime (this was pre-Pornhub, youngins!)

40. You’d to
push some guy to prom
, but nonetheless slept with a lady that evening

41. Your body fought someone who flirted with your girlfriend at least once

You’re not from longer isle if you haven’t punched him/her from inside the face at Pride.

42. You used to be hopelessly crazy about a
directly woman
whom skateboarded

43. You had to attend „religion class”

The emphasize of my personal high-school job was acquiring fingered for the church bathroom.

44. „All The Things She stated” by t.A.T.u. had been the crap

45. You smoked smoking cigarettes within beach in winter season within automobile

And thought you were thus cool and alt.

46. You drove 20 minutes or so to attend the drive-thru Dunkin’

Although there is a walk-in one right-down the block.

47. You drove two hours to obtain Sonic in New Jersey

Degrees of trainingn’t caught on, here actually wasn’t much to-do.

48. You drove as your only supply of enjoyable

Are you seeing a design here?

49. You held hearing about LIGALY while knowing you’d rather perish than action foot in LIGALY

Actually loser closeted teenagers on extended isle have actually criteria. We wished to celebration in a dark nightclub, perhaps not consume stale donuts in a community center.

50. You had a Ryan Cassata CD

Which you ordered when he visited your own GSA.

51. You h




offer a crush on a lady who went to a catholic class

52. You „hated” your mother but invested daily together with your mommy

The family codependency is actually genuine.

53. You missed junior prom

We invested junior prom eating at welcoming’s together with the various other gays.

54. You concentrated so hard on the ground within the locker room you very nearly fell over

God forbid a woman thinks you are observing her education bra.

55. May Die Otherwise Wearing Converse

56. You drew tattoos all-over the human body (because trimming was actually as well severe)

We were as well sheltered and responsive to reduce.

57. You decided to go to Hot Topic subsequently left since you had gotten unnerved

Because there was always a hot dyke working at sign-up, you weren’t edgy adequate on her behalf.

58. You happened to be also too frightened to give Abercrombie or Hollister

Since it was actually dark and smelly inside — and because you used to be wildly attracted to the softball lez greeting kids in the doorway.

59. So you bought rainbow



paraphernalia



regarding the DL at Spencer’s

60. „Hairstyles of the Damned” rocked your world

Every queer child peruse this regarding the bus.

61. So did „The Catcher Inside Rye”

So, you became instructor’s pet.

62. You confided in your animal dog, cat, or hamster




because no person otherwise ~got you~

63. You owned close friends necklaces from Claire’s with a woman you ended up dating

64. You had written suicide records as a hobby

With zero goal of previously soon after through, you only like, required the *release.*

65. You have got an incredibly morbid, dark colored, and politically incorrect love of life

See 64.

66. You cannot sit Social Justice Warriors.

Long Islanders haven’t any determination for buzzwords.

67. You completely tend to be unlearning your f*cked upwards prejudices, however.

Getting homosexual doesn’t allow you to exempt from that.

68. You used to be obsessed with 3oh!3.

Inform your boyfriend, if according to him he is had gotten beef, that I’M A VEGAN, AND I AIN’T F*CKING SCARED OF HIM.

69. You browse to escape a grim reality, you merely ended up reading publications about younger gay teens becoming hate-crimed anyhow

Or you were hate-crimed to be a loss which reads.

70. Make use of „hate criminal activity” as a colloquialism.

71. You purchased



a „gay street” sign up the area visit to the metropolis

And hid it in your cabinet.

72. You hung a Pride banner within locker and took a Myspace image with-it

73. You had a DeviantArt membership

Mine unfortunately however exists.

74. You felt very significantly that you relate to Matthew Shepard and Laramie Wyoming while having nothing at all in accordance aside from getting homosexual

And also you was the star in „The Laramie venture,” directed by your odd drama instructor.

75. You made insensitive jokes about „The Laramie Project” since if you weren’t laughing, you had been crying.

My personal best friend and that I nevertheless go hysterical anytime we say „the shining lighting of Laramie.”

76. You went through your yearbook and guessed the person you thought ended up being homosexual also

77. You used to be in a love-hate connection along with your songs educators

78. You considerably seemed out the bus window when it rained

79. You understood every line to rent out

NO time just TODAY.

80. You played 7 Minutes In Heaven at an all-girls sleepover

Purr.

81. You keep in mind getting so frantically distressed you weren’t invited towards the all-girls sleepover where you’re SURE they played 7 Minutes In paradise

Sigh.

82. You pretended is frightened during horror films to put on your friend’s hand

Oldest strategy into the book, ladies.

83. You consumed your own sorrows in Elio’s Pizza as soon as you got residence from softball practice

Even though there were 10 incredible pizzerias in a two-mile radius of your home.

84. You had a Nextel walkie-talkie telephone

85.
Tegan and Sara
was your faith

86. P!nk




had been the distress

Missundaztood nonetheless slaps.

87. You considerably cried inside room playing „Family Portrait”

And even though your residence life had been in fact rather amazing plus mom was in the kitchen making sauce while your own father had been strolling your dog you ~swore~ you would care for.

88. You shared a skateboard around but could not actually skate

89. You shared cigarettes around but did not actually smoke

I forced my ex to carry smoking cigarettes everywhere to check tough.

90. You did anything to avoid fitness center class

Luckily for us, i’ve a disability. Additional gays had to get more imaginative.

100. You stated you were bi

But you had been truly homosexual just like the time is actually very long.

101. You visited
Flames Isle
every summer time without actually realizing it was gay middle

HOW did I not understand I happened to be thus near many dykes?

senior-chatroom.com sign in

102. You totally realized what your wellness instructor was actually making reference to whenever she mentioned her roommate

I’d the most significant crush on my health instructor.

103. You dressed in rainbow sweatbands

Dark.

104. You spent weekends drinking around dirty fitness equipment in a person’s basement

You used to ben’t cool sufficient to take in in parking lots so that you consumed near to the mom’s Gazelle.

105. You obsessively curated your myspace leading 8

106. You diverted the interest from the yourself by making fun of someone else in locker room

Darwinism.

107. You begged your own mother to order you shit from advertisements

108. You binged on unpleasant treats like Cosmic Brownies and Kool-Aid after school

109. You played those Barbie decorate games online so you might take their garments off

You dirty perv.

110. You corrupted the neighbors by making all of their Sims flirt with girls

111. You kissed women as a „game” because you were „acting”

112. You viewed „Boys do not Cry” because only gay content material in GSA and were scared back to the dresser a little

113. Then you watched „But i am a Cheerleader” and had gotten much more afraid

114. If you should be fortunate, you’d one
queer aunt
who lived-in NYC and gave you wish.

115. You intensely masturbated to MTV music video clips

I’ll most likely never disregard the first-time I noticed the „Genie In A Bottle” movie.

116. The cool women just who bullied you now have several kids and benefit a



pyramid



plan

Hey! i understand we haven’t talked in a bit. Exactly how have you been girl?! Was wanting to know if you were thinking about mastering a little more about Mary Kay?

117. You watched „subsequent” with the doorway shut since it was a bisexual event

NEEXXTTTT.

118. You snuck peeks of titties through the 18+ part of the movie store

119. You viewed Scrambled Porn Channel on route 99

120. You experienced the heartbreak to be in the shopping center and seeing straight partners holding arms and sensation that way will not be your

121. You have got away with creating out in the hall as the instructors did not want to be implicated of dislike crime-ing you

122.  You w




atched „Donnie Darko” with queer art children and



pretended



to enjoy it to fit right in

The F*CK had been up with that film?

123. You composed I <3 **** on your laptops

As you happened to be as well frightened to actually write the crush’s name.

124. You loved „Twilight”

Or believed a smug sense of superiority for hating it.

125. You had debilitating stress and anxiety on
National Developing Day

126. You probably believed the fear of goodness if your parents mentioned homosexual folks

127. You burnt CDs with custom playlists for women you’d crushes on

128. You dated a woman with an eating condition

129. You dated a lady while having your eating disorder but hers ended up being worse and that means you needed to give attention to that

Said Long Islanders have actually unacceptable senses of humor.

130. You dressed in men’s



cologne



to attract the




girls

131. You seemingly have actually many repressed trauma, and you are recognizing it as you are causeing the listing

Nevertheless cannot prevent cackling along with your best friend the person you survived every thing with.